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Grieving the Loss of a Dearest Mother, Mommy Lydia

Missing your smile Mommy Lydia...
One of my fave pictures of Mommy Lydia taken last July 30, 2016 during my 50th Birthday Celebration

It’s been two days since we brought my mother-in-law, Mommy Lydia to her final resting place last December 7, 2016.

She joined her Savior and Creator last December 2, 2016 at the age of 79

I love Mommy Lydia dearly…like my own mother. And she treated me like her own. Jonjie  always say that I am the daughter and he is the son-in-law.

Much as I want to focus on my pains, but I know that Jonjie is suffering more than I do. And he’s doing it silently…

Yesterday, I reported for work reluctantly. I wanted to extend my leave of absence for another day, so I could be with him, but he did not want me to.

He told me truthfully, “please, I need this time to be alone because even a Super Daday needs to cry, sometimes”.

My heart went out to him.

IMG_2322_edited
One of the few pictures of Mommy Lydia and Jonjie taken last March 29, 2013 at Ilocos Sand Dunes.

And I remember the lines of a song,

But they don't see inside of me
I'm hiding all the tears

They don't know that I come running home when I fall down
They don't know who picks me up when no one is around
I drop my sword and cry for just a while
'Coz deep inside this armor
The warrior is a child
Warrior is a Child by Gary Valenciano

This morning, while still in bed, I heard him mutter, “ayoko nang maramdaman ang sakit”. (“I do not want to feel the pain”).

There is nothing I can do but to embrace him tightly and let him know that I am here…I will always be here.

I have been in the same situation last July 2014, when my own mother passed. But unlike him, I cried when I felt the need to, regardless where I was. And it helped ease the pain…until the next bout of loneliness. Then, grieving and remembering starts all over again…

One thing is certain, we will always be here for each other to give comfort and assurance that everything will be alright.